The “Cure” Will Do More Damage Than The Disease
I was one of the very first kids involved with PDAP when it came to Denver Colorado in 1975. I spent 5 years in the program and I had a lot of good times. I felt like I was "sticking with winners in order to grow." I was surrounded by my friends. I lived with PDAPers, hung out every evening with PDAPers.
My sponsor told me when it was OK to date someone, and when I was ready for a relationship. I was OK with that, I mean she had been sober a lot longer than me and she had a white fist, so she knew what she was doing. I was told not to go back to high school, there was too much temptation.
Once I was sexually assaulted by a counselor, but my sponsor, along with a whole room full of other counselors, convinced me over the course of a four hour long heart to heart discussion that I had set the situation up to sabotage my own sobriety. I was actually encouraged to apologize to my assaulter, something I was unable to do. This was the beginning of the end for me in PDAP.
The other problem I was having is I'm really smart. (Who'd a thunk it, after making such bone headed choices?) I wanted to go to college. I was told that if I did, I would end up getting high, and get kicked out of the group. This was a terrifying prospect. This is when I began to understand the depth and breadth of the manipulation. Everyone I knew, everyone I cared about, loved, even lived with, was in the program.
I would lose everything. My home, my "family", my sense of security and safety, even my sobriety. Just so I could go to a community college. I was absolutely terrified, but I jumped. I was homeless and friendless when I started classes at Front Range Community College in the fall of 1980.
It took me years to re-learn how to live as an independent human being, and to come to terms with the idea that, smart as I am, I was in a cult. I am still ashamed of what I did to others in my spiritual care as a ‘loving” sponsor and friend. I at least have had the comfort of knowing that PDAP had imploded after the 60 Minutes interview with Bob Meehan.
You can’t imagine my absolute horror when I walked into an 8th grade classroom last week and saw a brochure with a large monkey fist on the cover. It’s called The Cornerstone Program and it is a Bob Meehan production.
Please, please do some research before you put someone you love into anything that can be connected to Bob Meehan or his stepson. In this situation the “cure” will do more damage than the disease.
Palmer Drug Abuse Program Survivor - 1975
