Not a Typical Staff Meeting
The Crossroads Program Staff Survivor: 2003 - 2009
Truthfully it is hard to share Purpose stories because I don't remember a lot of details. Likely because I walked into every single Purpose SO afraid I just blocked much of it out, while I sat there hoping I would not be the one put on the "hot seat" that night.
In the Group, I was on Steering Committee so I was accustomed to the process but I knew how to behave in the Group so as to be accepted by staff. On staff, the microscopic level you were looked at was much more intense and also more vague (or just based on whatever the director cooked up) so you never knew if you might be the one to have to bare your soul and everything that might possibly be wrong with you (as determined by the director) in front of all of your peers/coworkers/bosses/friends - because they are one in the same.
As a side note, if this isn't already clear, this was not a typical staff meeting. We did not generally discuss the Group at all or how to improve what we offered - we were the improvement. These "meetings" were solely to disclose everything about ourselves to everyone on staff. To share personal details of anything we might be going through to remain "accountable" with all of the staff. If that doesn't sound inappropriate to you, you might want to take a close look at your employer. Not many people in staff were old enough to have any professional jobs before joining the Group or becoming a staff member (I joined at 15), so you remain in the dark about the appropriateness of these interactions and after having been groomed from the Group, this all seems reasonable.
The memories I do distinctly have are from my time on staff in Missouri, for Crossroads. Through 2007, the US experienced a recession. Because of this, families did not have as much money to throw around for out of pocket programs, like the Group was. But somehow, this was determined to be the fault of someone on staff. Every Purpose became a witch hunt. The witch hunt started with watching The Secret. If you don't remember The Secret, per Google, "It is based on the belief of the pseudoscientific law of attraction, which claims that thoughts can change a person's life directly. The book alleges energy as assurance of its effectiveness." This was used against us to the fullest extent - someone was spiritually blocking people from coming into the Group.
In each Purpose for several months, someone would discuss how they were the Block - as determined beforehand by Mike Weiland. They would each explain how they'd had a talk with Mike and they were here to explain to us all what they were personally doing which was spiritually blocking people from coming into the Group.
Keep in mind that during this period of time, we were also not getting paid regularly due to the decrease in new people.
I remember a few staff members sharing how they were determined to be the Block. The one I remember most clearly was someone who had taken a ride with Mike somewhere and he asked them not to roll down the passenger window. Several minutes later, this person forgot and they rolled down the window. If you aren't sure by now what that has to do with Purpose, your "level of spiritual attraction," or people coming into the Group, then you are correct. However, Mike determined that they were the problem because of this. Somehow, because they forgot what he said, they were not working a "good" program and this became all twisted up into how they were actually not doing very well and this meant they were the Block. It was all fabricated for Mike's enjoyment.
I seemed to manage to always share just enough about something I was working on (you should "always be working on something or you're not growing" and not growing equaled relapse and death) to keep myself off the hot seat. I sat there petrified every single Purpose though, afraid of what I'd have to produce in front of everyone, scared I'd be the one who was unknowingly "fucked up."
It was just terrorizing to be a staff member. I have not heard from any staff survivors who have fond memories of Purpose although everyone on staff acted like they were excited for Purpose that night. This level of fear, scare tactics, and forced vulnerability is what further confirms these groups are cults.
The Crossroads Program is a drug and alcohol rehab center providing a treatment program for adolescents, teens and young adults (ages 13-25 ish). With locations in St. Louis and Kansas City, Missouri.
